Go to google, search for images and enter "child cry" or something like that. Look at the pictures for 30 seconds and tell me how you feel. Depressed? Stressed? Turned off? Yeah.
A new book was presented at T-online.de, my favourite site for digging up bullshit. Today's recommendation was a book called "Who says that children make us happy?". I was intrigued about the title and expected the merciless confession of parents who have had it with children and would rather go back in time to change their decisions. But I sensed only disappointment when I read the review. The book is obviously written in a "funny" way, trying to make parents laugh about child education. Then, in the last line of the review, it says "not suitable for parents who are in a serious family crisis". And that line basically sums up everything: Let's take it easy, but woah, if you're thinking about divorce or suicide, this book can't help you any more.
Then the book comes up with the usual excuses and false claims:
1. The bipolar lifestyle excuse
This is where the book tells you that being a parent gives you the maximum of both sides. You get more happiness than all the sex, hormones and achievements in the world could ever give you, and you get the biggest shocks, stress and panic that nothing else can give you, not even being stuck in a nightmare with all the horror movie villains you can think of.
What I say about this: What's wrong with mediocrity? Why does life always have to be "on the edge" or "on the limit" or "on the fast lane"? Look at some of the happiest people in the world. They usually live in poor countries, have little to no technology, and some of them meditate a lot and tell you that "desire causes suffering". So sometimes I think that going away from extremes is actually the calmer, better way of becoming happy.
2. The "shrugging it off" excuse
This is the previously mentioned way of making it "funny". You use funny phrases, humour, and just try to take it easy. Hey, it's only lfe, right? It's what everyone does and has been doing. You wouldn't be here if your parents hadn't walked through hell like you are going through hell right now, right?
Here they ignore the fact that you, the parent, are having a serious problem. You don't buy a book just for fun when it's about child education. You are not looking for entertainment. You are looking for help. Is it REALLY just me who can see the connection between three things: Divorce, Child education and more and more spoilt brats treating the grown-ups like shit? It's a deadly triangle.
3. The lie about "life goes on"
Most people who want kids are not fully aware of the consequences they face if they make a child. It is easily said, but hardly realised what it means to make a child. Everything changes. You can say these two words just like that:
Yeah. Even if you add "forever", it's only a bunch of words. You don't get the meaning of it. You don't understand what it truly means. You think to yourself, oh yeah, what could go wrong. But only when the child is there you realise how much it depends on you. And you are stuck with the child. For 5 years, 10 years, 20 years... when the child moves out, let's assume for one nano second that it will no longer annoy you with phone calls regarding money, relationship or drug problems... let's assume it is over finally. Then tell me: How old are you now that it's over? How about some "living on the edge" now? Being 50 years old and paying off your mortgage for your family house. Yeah... go and live on the edge, you in the business suit with the bald head.
One thing remains, and it's science: Results from some survey said that couples without children are happier than couples with children. It raises a lot of shitstorms if you walk around with that statement written on your forehead. Don't offend the parents. They don't want to suffer for nothing. Yeah, they do suffer. Acknowledge them, pity them.
I don't like the fact that having children is mandatory, so to speak. When people get married, there is always the question about when there will be children. Our society is eager to make sure everyone goes through this. But I'm officially withdrawing from this pressure. And I know I'm not alone. Whoever feels so happy around children can have children, but I am not ready and I will not let this not being ready cause unhappiness to some child that I create out of some urge of selfishness or making my parents proud. No, thank you.
I love my unborn children too much to let them suffer through this *smiles*.
Instead, I will enjoy travelling the world on behalf of them... I will just have twice the fun *smiles*.