Philosophical thinking

The last days were all about ups and downs. It was an emotional journey. On some days I felt good,on others sad or depressed,or worried to extremes.

I made a resolution. Not for next year,for now. Resolutions only work when you are serious about what you want. I will concentrate on not worrying too much. When something gets serious,then i have to tell myself that i can just write away everything that concerns me and then send it out into the world. Or i let it go. But if i decide to send it out,then i might want to write it here. So i'm glad you people read it. So someone will notice it and that makes me feel better already.

I think I realized some of the reasons why a relationship can be difficult,even when it's a happy one. The luxury of being single consists of the ability to live life according to your own ideas,without the slightest compromises or changes. There are things you never have to worry about. From simple everyday stuff like "What if my partner wants to live vegetarian" to serious matters like "What if my partner dies", there's nothing for a single to worry about. Of course you might say,when you have someone you can both try to split up your needs. So everyone lives the way they want to. One could be the most religious person in the world,the other one an atheist. One could love to go to parties each weekend while the other one just sits at home. Or one could smoke and drink while the other one doesn't,and instead does other things the other person doesn't like. And so on. Okay,that was too much explanation.
For me,that's not really something i like. I want to get close to the person i love,and live with the same philosophy,or as much as possible the same way. It's okay to have personal hobbies and some alone time for each person. I'm not talking about simple stuff as that. I talk about stuff that has to do with how close ppl in a relationship are to each other. And that is something I struggle with.

When there are opposites,or big differences,only compromises help. That means changes,and changes often hurt. Or they are not easy to deal with.
I am able to adapt to changes. I only hope that there won't be a point where i can't follow any more. Where I can't make another step towards a compromise. And when I say this,i'm not afraid of everyday life. It's nothing that would necessarily make a couple split up again. What I am afraid of is that there might be a point where I have to say "Here,I must accept that we have different opinions on something philosophical/religious (insert any word you think fits)". Like i said before,it's not about one person being a jogger and the other one is more a club dancer. Blessed are the people who were brought up in a non-threatening environment when it comes to aspects of beliefs. Maybe it would be hardest for a religious person if the partner was a convinced atheist. And for the atheist,it would be the easiest thing in the world because there's nothing happening after death (for all atheists: I know that you might believe there is something after death like the elemental quarrel of the being but let's keep it simple).

Hm...I'm not really worried at the moment. That's a good sign i guess. I know that I think too much,but you must admit,someone who doesn't think about his life when he has the time doesn't think about his life when he's older,or does he? I think,either you are a person who thinks about life or you aren't.
I'm sorry if i caused confusion here. Hm...for everyone who read this,maybe you want to spend a moment of time to think where in life you stand,and what you believe in?