At the beginning of 2025, I spent a whole month or so in Singapore. That was a good thing because it gives me something memorable that makes 2025 more than the typical "transitory year" that I usually write about.
And in total, my mind is shifting towards the idea that life needs to be enjoyed more. The last period of my life when I had more than just transitory years was the time span between 2015 and 2018, when I had memorable trips to other countries each year, sometimes even more than once per year.
Having a memorable life is not only dependent on leaving the country though. There are other things that make like memorable, but visiting another country is probably the easiest way to make something stick to your mind longer term. And in a lifetime that is slipping away from me year after year, it is important that I have things to look back on. I will not take anything with me to the afterlife, as I believe there is no such thing, but at least I should not have to live with regret.
On the other hand, even if not everything is super meaningful and memorable, I can at least go through life with a feeling of "being aware" and contemplating things.
Just the other day I came across "the disintegration loops" by William Basinski. It's a seemingly endless musical loop. But what makes it special is that, while the artist recorded his music, the tape that was 20 years old at the time of recording slowly disintegrated as the magnetic tape flaked off while in the recording machine. It was an unintended effect but shows - in sound waves - how we all crumble over time. Add to that the fact that the music was created in the summer of 2001 and the artist then witnessed 9/11, where he himself videotaped the smoke clouds of that day from a distance and made it part of his work.
So what was 2025 like? At the beginning, I was in Singapore for a whole month, like I said. It was good being back after many years of not being there. Even that surprised me - the fact that I had been gone since 2017. With the pandemic and everything in between, I just couldn't make it back again.
After that, life returned to normal. However, quickly after the trip, I decided to take a detour in life and enroll in some sort of qualification program (Verwaltungslehrgang). It is fully paid by my employer. I think that this is a necessary step at this point. For 10 full years, I relied on having the same job in the same place, but I feel that I can no longer rely on this. I don't know why this is the case, but it seems that no matter what you try, you always find people who make life miserable and you have to escape them.
So while I do this course, I am stuck in this program for a year, from summer of 2025 until summer of 2026. And while I like it there, it's a bit unnerving to think of the changes that will have to come after that, and this also interferes with possible holiday plans, as I can't plan with certainty at all.
Other than that, I keep improving with my Indonesian. However, the more I learn, the more I realized what I can't do yet. My skills are mostly passive, and even in that regard, I just begin to slowly dive into less formal speech. I am keeping my progress to myself as to not raise any expectations around me.
2026 will most likely be a transitory year, and I'm not even sure if I will find a new work place. But since I am stuck with how things are going, I can't really plan anything other than to apply for jobs. So that's it.
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